i feel sort of sad
like i don't know where i fit in the world
i thought this solidarity made me strong
but i wonder if really it makes me weak
i remember my father crying on the phone asking
"i wonder if there is anyone out there for me"
what was i to say?
does he have any idea how much his absence effected my youth?
and still i want for him to be happy.
and i like being his friend
i hate when he gives me money
and i hate when he fusses over me (rarely happens)
but i like discussing things with him
and i really like that the other day when we talked and i began to disagree
he didn't fight me
he actually let me talk this time.
and it was really cool.
I'm really glad he's in my life